| Achievement | How to unlock
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- AAAAAaAaaAAAAAH! (20 points)
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| - Score 50 points in Spong.
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| - Play four hours of Hyperdrive Massacre.
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- Buy New Games Already (50 points)
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| - Score 30 own goals in Soccer.
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- Counterstriker (50 points)
| - Perform 100 kills by deflecting a bullet.
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| - Play one hour of Hyperdrive Massacre.
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- Deepspace Gung Ho (20 points)
| - Realize 1,000,000 points in Deathmatch
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- Fair and Square (50 points)
| - Score 10,000,000 points in Deathmatch.
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- Full Throttle (20 points)
| - Score 2000 points in Death Race.
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| - Score 50 goals in Soccer.
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- Game Set and Match (50 points)
| - Score 500 points in Spong.
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- Hyperdrive Marathon (50 points)
| - Travel a cumulative 3000km.
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- Hyperdrive Massacre (50 points)
| - Score 50,000,000 points in Deathmatch.
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- Hypergladiator (30 points)
| - Play 50 rounds of Hyperdrive Massacre.
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| - Play 10 rounds of Hyperdrive Massacre.
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- In The Fable, The Tortoise Wins (20 points)
| - Every player keep an average speed below 78 km/h for the round.
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| - Score 100 goals in Soccer.
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- Mile High Club (20 points)
| - Travel a cumulative 500km.
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- Mirror Mirror (20 points)
| - Perform 20 kills by deflecting a bullet.
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- My Pals Come 'Round a Lot (40 points)
| - Play 100 rounds of Hyperdrive Massacre.
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| - Play ten hours of Hyperdrive Massacre.
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| - Score 5 own goals in Soccer.
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| - Score 100 points in Spong.
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| - Score 500 points in Death Race
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| - Play two hours of Hyperdrive Massacre.
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- Starting Small (10 points)
| - Play one round of Hyperdrive Massacre.
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- Suicidial Tendencies (20 points)
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- Super Dynamic Killing Time (20 points)
| - Every player keep an average speed above 220km/h for the round.
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- The Beautiful Game (50 points)
| - Score 500 goals in Soccer.
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| - Win a match without being killed once.
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- We Can't Stop Here (50 points)
| - Score 8000 points in Death Race.
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