| Achievement | How to unlock
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| - You've saved 10,000 Jedits! Good job!
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| - You've earned 2,500 Jedits! Nice work!
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| - It's still OK! You've only wrecked 10 times.
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| - Wow, 250,000 Jedits! Actually, with inflation, it's not as much as it sounds like.
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| - Or, rather, 25 competitor ships are booming, if you know what I mean!
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| - You've gotten the edge on 10 competitor ships!
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| - Mark 5 competitor ships destroyed!
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| - With one pizza, fed 5,000...
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| - You're not blaming me for those 75 wrecks, are you?
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- Don't Drive Like This in Real Life
| - It's one thing in the game, but 50,000 Jedits is no joke.
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| - You owe 100 Jedits in damages!
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| - Only professionals should shark 10 times!
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| - You've circled around 50 vehicles (and/or houses)!
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| - 25 wrecks! Are you doing alright?
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| - Just pay the 500 Jedits and hope they don't make a police report.
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| - Which ship do you want to fly, today? You have them all!
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| - 100,000 space miles and counting!
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- I Guess You Went Pretty Far
| - 2,500,000 space miles. Pretty far, if you think about it.
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| - Yeah, 200 wrecks! That's how it's done!
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| - It's led me in circles 250 times, now.
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- It's Time to Turn Off the Computer
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- Like Some Kind of Shark Tornado
| - You've spun around like a shark 1,000 times, now!
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- Literally Destroying the Competition
| - Get it? Because you've literally destroyed 75 competitor ships.
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- Maybe This Game Isn't for You
| - 75 wrecks, I mean...not everyone is good at these kinds of games. It's fine.
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- Maybe You Should Go Outside
| - 500 wrecks is good. Why not start a new adventure?
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| - You've wrecked 5 times. These things happen!
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| - 10 wrecks caused by me?! Sorry!
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| - Hey, look, I didn't cause 25 wrecks on purpose or anything...
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| - Move over, Big Pizza! Pizzarian is #1 in the Jovian system!
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| - There's no real reason for you to shark 5,000 times.
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| - 2,500 Jedits! This is going on your permanent record.
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| - 50,000 Jedits should be an adequate amount for rolling purposes.
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- Seriously, You're Doing This on Purpose
| - 200 wrecks?! Really? Really...?
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- Should Have Bought Insurance
| - They'd probably drop you after paying 10,000 Jedits, though.
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- Signed, Sealed, Delivered
| - One whole kilopizza delivered!
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| - I'll take one order of 250 pizzas, please.
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| - 25,000 extra space miles, to be exact!
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| - More than 9 yards! You went 5,000 space miles!
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| - You're a fake videogame money millionaire.
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| - Everything at your pizza shop is top-knotch, now that you've bought all the upgrades!
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| - Well, maybe not infinity, but at least 500,000 space miles.
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| - You're a 50-pizza delivering machine!
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| - I don't even know how you played the game to destroy 200 competitors.
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