| Achievement | How to unlock
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| - Get killed by the suicide droid.
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| - Beat the game without dying.
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| - Boil away all the water and burn the toast.
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| - Destroy 3 bots in 2 seconds or less.
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| - Fly the Xanadu back to Earth.
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| - Destroy every cleaner bot.
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| - Unlock the bonus mini-games.
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- Please put your seats in the upright position
| - Put every toilet seat up.
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| - Fly the Xanadu into a star.
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| - Scan the Xanadu with the Survey Bot.
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- Sign him up for the Knicks!
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| - Destroy a robot with the showers.
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| - Beat the game in 10 minutes or less.
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- Surgeon General's Warning
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| - Become king of the zombies.
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| - Experience an attack of flatulence.
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| - Get killed by the environment.
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| - Find and read "The Unusual Death of Governor Li".
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- You've always been the caretaker…
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